This is nothing like the post I wrote yesterday that got deleted. I couldn't get the energy back to re-write it, I hope it comes back to me someday, but in the mean time, here's where I'm at.
You know those people in your life that you think have it all together? They seem flawless in everything they do. They attended a good college, have a good job, a nice husband, they are athletic, trim, funny, and when they drop their buttered toast, it does not land butter side down...Well I was speaking to one of the many of these I have in my life last night, and a few things dawned on me.
1) We all have our demons
2) It doesn't matter what someone believes, if they believe it to be true, it is.
As far as #1 goes, yeah, duh. But it is important to remind myself of this when putting someone on a pedestal.
#2 is a little harder for me to swallow, but at the same time means tremendous growth for me. Let me explain. My seemingly totally together friend was talking about how she wanted the scale to be 5 pounds lower. End of story. She knows that muscle weights more then fat. She knows that muscle takes up less room in the body then fat. None of that matters, because she has her mind set on a certain number.
My thoughts that I kept to myself as she was telling me this: "she doesn't need to lose any weight, is she crazy?" "She works out a lot, I wonder if she cares if its muscle she's losing?" "How can someone be so smart, yet be so hung up on an arbitrary number?"
The growth here is me keeping my thoughts to myself. I just listened. I didn't ask what her plan was, or why or whatever. I just listened and fully understood that there is nothing in the world I can say to her to make her think otherwise. Her beliefs are shaped by her experiences and education, as are mine. We are human, and we are all different.
What a relief it was to not push my ideas onto someone else. To just sit back, and take note of the fact that someone I always considered to have it all together, may in fact not.