The other day, when I woke up wide awake before my alarm and began my day, it was the start of something big inside me. Since that day three days ago, there has not been one single doubt in my mind that I'm going to make it this whole year without sugar/grains/legumes etc. Not one.
Its almost as if overnight I can see myself getting smaller, my clothes getting bigger. Definition is forming in my arms again, and I've been pushing myself as hard as I possibly can at the gym. Everything just makes sense, and its so goddamnsimple it kills me. Why, why, why?! Was I wasting so much time before making things hard on myself? Spinning my wheels, self-destructing, and beating myself up are no longer part of my daily activities.
Choosing to make such big sweeping lifestyle changes to not happen instantly. As much as I would like to be the person that can say they are going to do something and actually do it, that just is not me. I've always been in awe of these people, but never one of them. My life seems to be made up of me having to work 5 times as hard as anyone else to get things to go my way. I have noticed that the things I want, really, truly want, I continue to go after. I don't let minor setbacks stop me.
A Paleo lifestyle is just like any other skill I've attempted in my life. The first time I got into a boat could I sail it? No. But I kept at it. The first time I picked up a bar to try and perform a Power Clean, I didn't get it. But I kept at it. The first time I tried Paleo I had some success, but got derailed. I'm keeping at it. Nothing has made me feel so good about myself for so long. Nothing has felt more right for me, from the top of my head to the tips my toes, to my core. I feel amazing. I'm full of life and energy and thoughts...everything is so clear.
Do people feel like this all the time? More importantly, are there people that feel like this all always, and therefore wouldn't even know what it feels like to NOT feel like this? That thought blows my mind. If giving into some meaningless food temptation means losing this feeling, its just not worth it. That is how I know I'm going to make it the whole year- my mind is free to see my full potential, and wow, just like everyone that has ever sold themselves short, I realize have so much untapped genius to share...
I'm not going to risk throwing that away for anything. Look, out, here I come. LIFE IS AWESOME.