Monday, June 21, 2010

Food Lobotomy

Before I started eating Paleo, I should have done a better job of chronicling and describing my daily thoughts about food. The struggles that took place inside my head between what my brain said I wanted, and what I knew was wrong for me were constant. Cravings, planning, needing, feeling guilty, feeling high, feeling low, all were a part of a normal day. I let my stomach and my cravings dictate my day. Foods would just pop into my head, and I HAD to have them. Sometimes I could put it off for a few days, but they were always in the back of my mind until I ate them. Even after I just ate, I could think about a certain food and be hungry all over again. I knew I was a slave to something bigger than me. I knew there had to be another way to live.

Over the past few weeks I have noticed here and there how my cravings have subsided, and I don't eat as much or as often, and that I don't think about food anymore. I never really stopped to think about any of these facts until just now. These are HUGE steps away from the prison I was in. These are HUGE steps towards the life I want to be living.

It really hit me this weekend, when I was making coffee, and I spotted something odd on top of the refrigerator. A closer inspection revealed it was a container of donut holes...coconut crunch donut holes. I thought to myself "Dave must have gone shopping." I went about the rest of my morning. A few hours later, as I passed by the container again, I kinda said "oh, yeah..." to myself because I had FORGOT they were there.

This may not seem like a big deal to anyone else out there, but let me explain how prior to Paleo eating my reaction to the donuts would have been different. First off, donuts are like crack to me. I absolutely cannot refuse a donut, and seem to have a bottomless pit of a stomach when eating them. Secondly, whenever I find something in the cupboards or in the house that appears to be "hidden" from me (presumably so I won't eat it all) that makes me want to eat it all. I know, nucking futs, right? So, upon seeing the package, I would have either a) immediately grabbed a few to snack on, felt good, then a few hours later felt bad (both physically and mentally) and gone back for more. This would have repeated until they were gone. b) resisted having one, knowing that "a" would happen. Also, they were out of sight for a reason, so I can't eat them all. I would have thought like this until I had a valid rationalization and then ate most or all of them.

Instead of my whole day being dictated by a sighting of donuts on top of my fridge, I completely forgot about them! If that isn't proof of a food lobotomy, I don't know what is. Oh, and I'm down one more pound this week.

2 comments:

  1. YAY! evil little donuts! your pic is gorgeous!!! i say this every time, but your face is totally different. like a fish-lipped supermodel. lol. i better start thinking of the 30lb present.

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  2. That's how you know you're doing something right. I still have those troubles, but I'm getting better at it. Great job resisting those evil donuts!!

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