Boys are Gross

This week has been a whirlwind of busy. I can't say I'm not to blame, because I'm the queen of procrastinating, but seriously, I need there to be two Fridays this week. Or two Thurdays (today?! yikes!). I'm leaving town on Saturday morning, and when I arrive back in Seattle on Tuesday, my mom will be with me, seeing my house for the first time.

I'm sure everyone is familiar with "the mom clean." You know, the one you ONLY do when you know your mom is coming up? Because she raised you good? Last time she was visiting and I still lived in my condo, I caught her running a long spatula under my stove, past where the broom can reach (presumably looking for dust bunnies?) She says she dropped one of her vitamins down there...but I'm skeptical. Luckily, I passed that test with flying colors (boyfriend is a great mom cleaner).

The mom clean can be daunting enough as it is, however I decided that there were some nice little projects I wanted done around the house before she came up. Things like, tiling the bedroom, painting the bedroom, painting the front door, etc. Well, somehow those all got pushed to this week as well. That's enough to do if you don't count my job (boss really likes to pile it on before a vacay), my homeowner association duties (the monthly meeting has to fall this week), gym time (didn't miss a day), and all the other little errands I need to do before I leave (shopping, haircut, etc.)

So yeah, slammed. However, as Saturday quickly approaches, I realize there is only so much I can do. In true to my style, I decide to throw another monkey into the wrench, or wrench into the monkey? I bought a refrigerator on Tuesday. It will be delivered the same day my mom and I are arriving (after our 2nd day of driving from San Francisco). It was such a good deal, I couldn't pass it up. But even fridge buying takes up precious time I didn't have. I sacrificed a trip to the hardware store that only sells the cabinet pulls we have. We need 12 more pulls, and the store has been out of stock for weeks, and the best they can do is say "just keep stopping by to see if they are in."

So, I buy the fridge, and realize I have an hour and a half to kill before a homeowners meeting that is right around the corner. I don't want to go back home, so I decide to take a walk around Greenlake, which is close. I had my gym clothes in the car from the morning, and was wearing a shirt with a sweater over it, I could just take my sweater off and be ready to walk.

I pull my running tights on under my skirt in the parking lot, and take my skirt off. I take my sweater off, and tie up my shoes. I start walking down around the lake, and about 10 steps in, a man was running towards me. He was just staring at me. Well, not at me, but at my breasts. That's when I remembered. The shirt I was wearing was kinda sheer, and although it was dark purple in color, in the daylight I bet my boobs made the shirt pull forward enough to be see-through! I immediately turned around, went to my car and put my t-shirt from my morning workout on over the sheer shirt. I'm SO glad that guy had the courtesy to stare me down when I was only 20 feet from my car.

I'm more grossed out by the fact that just by the look on his face I could tell that he could see through my shirt. Boys are gross. Ok...break time over. Back to work.

Introducing the "L-Sit"

Today may have been my hardest day at Crossfit thus far, not counting my first day that is, because first days are always the hardest. There were a few moments I was unsure if I would be able to finish my workout, as the way it was set up, the less strong you were, the longer the workout took.

We had to complete 3 minutes of the "L-sit"


Of course, there is no way I (or anyone that was working out with me today) could do that for 3 uninterrupted minutes. So, each time we "dropped" we had to do 5 burpees.

Burpee:


Let's just say I had to do A LOT of burpees, and even now, at 2:30pm 6 hours after my workout, my hair in a bun is still damp from sweat. However, I DID manage to do 3 minutes of the L-sit (well, modified) after 18 minutes, 51 seconds. So, that means I basically did 15 minutes of burpees. I wonder if my arms will be functional tomorrow?

Do I still like Crossfit? HELL YES. Although...ask me tomorrow. Ha ha.

I Want to be a Billionaire, So Fricken Bad

I'm guilty of letting the "less-Paleo" moments come more and more frequently. Forget starting on the slippery slope, I'm at the bottom of the hill. Ok, that might be a little dramatic, but it just seems as though lately I keep giving myself permission to not be the best I can be. I don't know what causes this phenomenon in me, but I can say with 100% certainty that it is the phenomenon that has contributed to my life-long struggle with my weight.

I know there are so many other people out there that struggle with this same phenomenon. I read it nearly everyday on various blog sites...its cyclical almost. Some bloggers are new and gung-ho (invincible!), some are settled into a routine (losses slowing...getting bored), and others have become comfortable and therefore have been "slipping up" more and more often (denial). In the 9 months I have been keeping this blog, how many times have you seen me in one of these various states? I know I have hit every single one at least once, if not multiple times.

If you have been at this for awhile like I have, the cycles become very familiar. I know what I'm supposed to do, and what I'm not supposed to do, yet, something compels me to rebel. The best way I can describe it is that I give myself permission to not be the best I can be. In my head, I'm backed up by my success over the past few months, I feel that it is "ok" to cheat. And the cheats come faster and faster. This has nothing to do with my diet not being sustainable, or because I'm lazy, or because I'm stressing out over something in my life. I think it may have to do with fear? Fear of the unknown? Fear of being great? I don't know, but if I ever figure it out, I'm going to be richer then Bill Gates. If anyone could figure out why fat people can't "just do what they are supposed to do for as long as they need to do it" there would not be a bazillion dollar weight loss industry. Just as the credit default swaps bet on people not paying their mortgages, the folks behind The South Beach Diet, or Weight Watchers, or P90X are betting, HOPING that I fail so I buy more shit (too bad suckers!).

Luckily, I've learned a whole bunch. Not everything, but a lot. I do know that if I don't do something fast, I'm going to sit at this weight for a long time, and then eventually go right back to where I was 9 months ago. What I need to remember is that there are things I can not eat. Ever. Its going to take practice, and that's what I'm chalking this little cycle up to- PRACTICE.

However, that does not change the underlying fact that I need to be better. I have seen great success in so many aspects of my life by eliminating grains, sugar, dairy, legumes, and alcohol. I have to accept that I can not drink an occasional beer. I can not eat a Larabar everyday. My diet must consist mostly of high quality protein, veggies, and healthy fats.

I'm revisiting my Eulogy post today, because I need to get back to the mind-set I was at when I wrote it. The day before I went Paleo.

Ants in my Pants

Friday. So hard to focus. Even more so then normal.

Every once in awhile, there is a post I read and I just want to jump up on top of my chair and shout "YES! YES!" The post resonates with me in a way I didn't even realize I wanted, or needed, but for whatever reason, I want to dive through my computer screen and meet the author.

Today, I read a post by Jen over at Prior Fat Girl. She is amazing. Her blog has quickly risen to be one of my favorites. I feel like if we lived in the same city we would be friends. (I'm not creepy, she just seems fun) Check out her blog, and especially the post today to see what I'm talking about.

Have all of you become a facebook fan of Dave's Cave? If so, THANK YOU. If not, I'm only going to keep bugging till you do.

Happy Friday!

Snowball vs. Unraveling

Lately it seems as though everything keeps going my way. Its as if the positive direction my health has taken has oozed into other aspects of my life, and things have snowballed. The events are so small that if I blinked I might miss them, but as they roll together, a significant ball of happy is formed.

Who knew that removing grains from my diet would lead to a job interview, or that joining Crossfit would make my radio only play good songs? Skeptics may say coincidence. Had I not been living it myself, I would align myself with those skeptics.

It makes me wonder, when I observe people I know getting things they want, meeting goals, etc., is this the reason why? They simply keep doing the right thing for themselves, and the rest falls into place? Positive begets positive, and then BAM! Success.

What a contrast this is to being on the other side of things, when I felt like I was constantly unraveling. Nothing was going my way. Oddly, that led to more of the destructive behaviors that caused even MORE to not go my way.

The Thai food I ate for lunch made it rain on all my outdoor runs. The ever shrinking wardrobe in my closet had me encountering traffic every time I was running just a little behind. It was like I was stuck in Alanis Morissette's "Ironic" song.

I know that some days will be inevitably bad/disappointing, but I can't help from thinking that I'm more prepared now to deal with these types of days. I continue to build up my confidence by attempting new things. With more confidence I feel better about myself in general. Feeling better about myself in general leads me to see more positive around me (and discount the negative). Seeing more positive means seeing even MORE positive. What does that equal? One hell of an annoying girl that is happy ALL. THE. TIME. and continues to have things go her way.

Man I used to hate those people.

Adorable

One of the hardest things for me to stop doing after I decided I needed to go Paleo was baking. I LOVE baking. Growing up, we were never allowed to buy pre-made, pre-packaged things. My mom said, if you want cookies, make them. I ALWAYS wanted cookies, so you can imagine what happened. Holidays, birthdays, basically any occasion was celebrated with home baked goodness. I watched my mom make hundreds of birthday cakes for her co-workers. *Side note- one time I even dropped one of the cakes she made for work on our driveway full of fall leaves and debris. I thought she might kill me. She brought it to work to show them that she at least made an effort, and guess what? THEY STILL ATE THE CAKE! Leaves, twigs, and all! My mom was blown away by how much her co-workers wanted to eat a cake she made.

So I have inherited the "making birthday cakes for my co-workers gene" I've taken on this role at nearly every job I've had, because EVERYONE deserves a homemade birthday cake on their birthday. Everyone. Today is my co-workers birthday.


This photo was taken about 30 minutes ago. We celebrate BIG in this office! (We are actually in a contest to see who can keep their stupid hat on the longest). These things are not designed for comfort.

Yesterday, I struggled a little internally as I knew I had to make a cake, I had to make a cake that my co-worker would like, and I also had to make a cake that may not necessarily appeal to me. When I bake, I have a serious problem with batter. I began thinking of options, and then, it struck me! I saw this cute Martha Stewart recipe for Oreo Cheesecake Cupcakes. I loved the idea because you put a single Oreo in the bottom of a cupcake liner, and then pour the batter on top. So, essentially, the whole Oreo is the bottom "crust" for the mini-cheesecake! I loved it.

I am not a big fan of cheesecake (gasp!). I knew it would not be hard for me to resist eating a batter of cheese and egg and sugar. I'm indifferent to Oreos, so there was no problem there either. WIN! So I went ahead, and made these ADORABLE treats:

Onto some Crossfit news:
Yesterday kicked so much ass. My official first week started on Monday. I'm now doing what is called their "on-ramp" program. I don't do the regular workouts, but instead I work with a trainer to learn the 9 basic movements, work on skills, and get slowly acquainted with the equipment/format/etc. There are 4 different levels of Crossfit. In order to pass from one level to the next, you must complete a standard set of skills. Once you get checked off for completing all the skills in Level 1, you move onto Level 2, etc. Yesterday, was skills day for me, and I was able to check off 5 things (out of 15-20?). Some things I won't be able to do for awhile. But still! I felt pretty damn accomplished.

Introducing: Dave's Cave

Do you want to eat healthy, nutritious, "clean" meals, but never have the time to think of ideas?

Are you interested in the way I eat, and want to test out some Paleo meals before deciding to take the full plunge?

Do you like to cook/want to learn more technique?

The food that I eat is just too good not to share with the world. So, I introduce to you: Dave's Cave.

Each day, a "meal of the day" is posted. The meal is sugar free, grain free, dairy free, legume free, and 100% delicious. Eating Paleo does not have to be hard, or complicated.

Please, check out the site, fan it on Facebook for daily updates, and let me know what you think!

Check out this post for my results after just 30 days of Paleo.

P.s. No, I have not been hacked. Please check out Dave's Cave!