More Lessons Learned

FYI, on Thursday, my laptop went "tits up" according to my boyfriend-deluxe (I can't really get into the term fiance, so boyfriend-deluxe is what we settled on).  This means blog posts have to be posted from my iPhone.  Not impossible, but a challenge none the less.  I apologize ahead of time for any formatting weirdness.  I really have a lot to say, especially regarding this past week.  I learned a lot about myself, my habits, and what I want to do about the things revealed to me that need work.
 
Nutrition challenge:
What I learned (and in some cases, re-learned) about myself-
I can cut out the majority of offending items (sugar, grains, dairy, legumes) from my diet and not only feel satisfied, but feel good.  Really good.  
I can eat this way for extended periods of time (I feel that 7 weeks is an extended period of time, and does warrant some kind of 'cheat'). 
The number on the scale has nothing to do with my body getting smaller. 
Sometimes the victories are in what I don't eat rather than what I do eat. 
Keeping record of all things that pass my lips is a great tool in accountability.   
 
My habits- Sometimes I genuinely miss being able to just eat whatever I want at the moment, and feel that euphoric feeling of being full and bad (self-induced because I know that some foods are bad for me) all rolled into one.  It seems weird typing it out, like people that don't know what this feeling is will be like "what?  how can someone miss feeling full and bad?"  I guess the only way to describe it is comfort?  I take comfort in that feeling? 
I want to eat to no end when I am angry, feel slighted, or feel as if I've been treated unfairly by the world (um...this is everyday...lol). 
I often want something sweet after a meal. 
I am a creature of routine, and perform much better when I plan my meals/days/shopping
Any seeming little disruption in what I think is a plan can send my whole world off balance (stove going out, laptop breaking, not winning the nutrition challenge...)
Wow, my habits are embarassing.
 
What I want to do about it-
Continue to keep my food logs
Continue to keep trying to better my attempts at clean eating- dedicate each week to a small change for the better- like eating more greens.  Continue to work on task until I feel its achieved.
Incorporate planned cheat meals to keep my sanity.  Cheat MEALS, not cheat WEEKS. 
Realize the power to change what I don't like is in my hands.
 
When the Nutrition Challenge Ended/And the Winners were Announced:
What I learned about myself- Giving myself a green light to eat anything I want for an unspecified amount of time is not going to work out.
Eating sugar/grains makes me incredibly thirsty and all over icky feeling
Its a lot harder to record foods that are unhealthy...do not want to type them
Foods that I have been imagining in my head for days or weeks never taste as good as they seemed in my head when I do finally eat them. 
I may have overestimated how clean I was eating
 
My habits- I will continue to eat something that isn't that appealing to me during a cheat time just because "I can."
When I found out I wasn't even in the top 5 females, I threw an internal fit and proceeded to eat shitty food (to show them!) 
Bad choices beget bad choices (well, I've already screwed up today, so..)
 
What I want to do about it-
See above, all of those apply.
Keep at it.  This new lifestyle may take numerous attempts before getting to a point that is realistic and manageable.
 
See?  Lots learned.  I guess you can say the nutrition challenge and week of downward spiral that followed were a gut check.  Ha.  So with that, I will be taking all I have learned/re-learned and move forward.  I still have an ultimate goal of eating clean and performing functional movements in the hopes of correcting my body to its genetic blue-print. 
 
If you haven't taken a look at my Weekly Food Logs (posted in the tab on the top of the page) please do!  Starting next this week (posted next week) I will be stating my goal for the week.  You can see how well I do!